8/12/23

The Existential Nature of Eating Disorder Recovery

The last few posts circle a pressing issue in modern day life, especially post-pandemic life. It’s more common for us to be home now and feel comfortable in an increasingly virtual world. As much as we have the luxury and convenience of having everything at our finger tips, there’s something fundamental to the human experience that is slowly fading from our lives.

One element we are missing is social interaction. Virtual relationships certainly do matter and saved us all through the pandemic. However, we are biologically built to be social beings. Extensive research shows that our health and well-being benefit enormously from in person contact, something we are slowly agreeing isn’t as important anymore.

On a more profound level, engaging with the world enables us to find meaning and purpose in our lives in a way that virtual life cannot replace.


Eating disorders create purpose, meaning and structure to people’s lives. The day revolves around how to eat, how to move and how to plan each and every day. It’s clear every night if the day was a success or failure based on the philosophy and morals of an eating disorder. The eating disorder brings pain but also enables people to find a sense of purpose, safety and even calm.


If we retreat to the virtual world, the structure of an eating disorder becomes even more appealing. Diet culture, the exercise industry and the wellness cult draw us further into these depths and away from lives with meaning. The media easily confound any sense of direction in life through endless advertising and images that associate food and weight with personal value. Individual choices drown when faced with the overwhelming messages about health and thinness. And social media imprint a profound sense of inadequacy about who we are and how we live.


The cure to most of these ills is out in the world. Purpose and meaning come largely from relationships. We find our best selves learning from others and celebrating the complex, emotional and new experiences in our daily lives.


In order to decrease the incidence of eating disorders, our society needs to prioritize interaction and relationships enough for people to find identity and meaning outside themselves. It’s not a small task but a necessary one.

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